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 Because, let’s face it – we are idiots and we will buy these things.
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The Burnout series is synonymous with fun for me. Being a PS2 owner from way back when I was a cursey teen instead of a cursey adult (or someone in their early 20's) as I am now, it's like a Pokémon evolution except not cool and really just learning about controlling my emotions and maturity and all that lame stuff. Included in that evolution was getting a PS3, and eventually being excited about the release of Burnout Paradise. I actually owned a PSP at one point and playing Burnout Dominator was bliss for me. Long bus rides filled with angsty or beat-punching music as I swerved corners and took badasses down whilst everyone just kinda looked at the weird fat kid and wondered where his guardian was.
Burnout Paradise was a personal low in the series. Despite, friends having the initially pre-release, I convinced myself that a free-roaming city was actually "really cool" and that it totally wouldn't be "lame" and you'd have a lot more freedom. I was wrong. Really wrong. I don't know about you but being in a free-roaming cityscape and having no sense of direction, as well as a poorly intuitative, linear map design really doesn't bode well with someone thinking in free-roaming mode. So burned by that Burnout experience, the announcement of another Burnout game spurred the pessimist in me and I was excited once again, but when I saw the first video's for it, I wasn't too pleased. I was less than pleased and the optimist inside me died...just a little...not too much, I hope.
I did go into Burnout Crash with less than a positive aspiration for what the game actually might be. I know people don't like people who waffle on, so let's just say Burnout Crash is good and there is a demo you can play, it's free, it'll give you a good indication of what it's like except for some modes but let's also say that Burnout Crash is initially underwhelming.
The 2D opening is cutesy to say the least but so mediocre it doesn't really register on my mental spectrum as being a video game. It reminds me of the animated sequence in Catch Me If You Can and I'm half expecting the little ute (or pick up truck for our US readers) to hit a tiny Leonardo DiCaprio and send him flying against a 2D wall...but yes, it's underwhelming and my memories of Burnout begin to fade, like the opening screen does. I left the opening on too long to start writing the opening paragraph, the visuals humming away in the background with my PS3 and then a song begins.
This is where my opinions change by a simple video and musical manipulation. The song by The Primitives, aptly titled - at least for this game - Crash and I'm brought back to a simpler time in my childhood called the 90's, when this song was not written. It's an 80's New Wave pop song and whilst I became a fan of New Wave some time in my late teens, the song still resonates and I'm back to apart of what makes the Burnout series amazing, the mind numbing, heart racing music. When I say mind numbing, I don't necessarily mean it in a bad way, it's just beautiful background fodder. Much like the Clair De Lune in Burnout Paradise or Shotgun by The Outline in Burnout Revenge, it brings you into a different element when it comes to the game.
One of my fondest memories of Burnout Paradise is watching the sun slowly set just as Clair De Lune began and I started a Takedown Race and watched the shadows stretch and pull the landscape of the city as I raced from night into day and won with 12 Takedowns when I only needed 5. I get weird when it comes to games and music. Most pieces just wash over me and I just shrug my shoulders, but when there's a piece that's memorable, it really sticks. Whether it's the beautifully whimsical music from Legend of Zelda, a series I've barely played or the block rocking minimal piano and beats of Minecraft - it all sticks in my mind like Tetris tessalated musical blocks.
PICTURE OF MARIO MUSICAL BLOCK
Of course, the Burnout series is just more than music and so I actually start playing Burnout Crash and stop listening to the Primitives for the 12th time....and I press start and the song actually starts to play in full, kicking off with a lovely little animated explosion of the pick-up. The menu kicks in after a failur to login to the PSN/Autolog network and a voice gives me a warm douchey welcome, sadly often associated with Burnout games. No one I really know is a frat kind of person and I feel EA keeps those voice over guys for that reason, I kinda liked it when it was the chick running Crash FM, but meh, that was then, this is now.
So far, the visual design is nothing like the little opening animated feature, with a nice little neon sign design floating as the menu and I kick off the game itself (after adjusting the sound settings, music up, voice over off). So after I'm told I'll be on the wildest ride of my life I choose the first mission and go on a bit of a rampage and you know what, it's fun. It's consistently fun, it's a whole lot of fun. Seeing those little cars coming, which is indicated in-game by a yellow arrow, and noticing all the little details on the houses and cars and just everything, I want to look at it closer but also destroy it at the same time. It's like being Clockwork God with a magnifying glass, but alas, my creations are not my own, only the destruction. But alas, before all the destruction there's a tutorial and it's a bit annoying.
Last time I was in a gaming DMV I decided not to play the game, that game was Driver, I was 8, things were different. Here it's nice little tutorial that tells you about all the great things including the "Crazy Special Feature", which didn't exactly hype me up despite the vocal inflection and after playing Bastion last week I feel all voice overs need better voice actors or better writers, seriously. There could have been a lot more to do with the wacky voice-over, there are a few amusing lines here and there such as the description of the area being remembered as "all field" and the voice over actor pausing and being like "oh...it still is", I laughed at that, but the humour was far and few between and like Dreamworks movies, relied too much on pop culture than raw wit.
Old system of "More stars to unlock more cars" gives you a good old sense and even with the top-down look, Burnout Crash becomes a lot less like the Burnout series minute by minute. What I feel is Criterion should have just called it Crash. I understand that they may have possibly been sued by Universal for use of the fluffy Bandicoot character, but using the brand recognition of Burnout really doesn't work here. It's a real identity crisis where it's clear they want to re-establish their brand for whatever reason. I remember Burnout selling like hotcakes, with every iteration since the 3rd one, and personal favourite, Takedown. The actual game itself does get a big hand from musical and sound cues, but a better focus on gameplay and making the game a lot more interesting, in regards to the voice work and writing, would have been better. For example, whilst the game out and out visually wants to have a rough design, it wants new players to the franchise to remember "to use that Crashbreaker" in an overly excited tone as if the big flashing x button on screen and the fact that other than kinda moving/sliding around the map, there isn't much else to do in-game, other than be amused and giggle when a bank truck comes along and the bombastic voice of Shirley Bassey claims "HEY, BIG SPENDER"...I giggled...like a girl.
Despite my girl giggling, there will be a lot of references young player - new players - won't get and will be baffled why they're in the game at all. Hearing Spandau Ballet's Gold when I blew up a golden truck was amusing for me but may only reach 5% of the people who play the game, seriously after reading the above paragraph, who knew 1. Who Spandau Ballet was/is? and 2. Who Shirley Bassey was? The identity crisis Criterion creates is more of a cultural problem than a gaming problem. Licensing those tracks would have cost them/EA millions, literally, and if it was worth it, I feel like we're on the inside of an in-joke, but everyone keeps beating the outside of it and it just keeps making a hollow thud.
I do want to give a handshake this week to two people, the guys who chose the music and the visual designers. As much as I've bitched about the visuals in the game, I do have to say the mix of eclectic styles of Neon-signed - almost Las Vegas in tone - and the cute top down car creations, it all works. It melds into this odd piece of automotive Americana, filled with the right colours here and there to look it mildly entertaining as well as watchable. When almost every week there's a lot of grey and brown being sloshed around, it's good to see emerald, aqua and crimson red to be thrown into the mix. Sure, the game does have a fairly consistent use of black on the menus, but it adds to the steel and burning rubber style Burnout is known for, and that's where it really takes a different side to the Burnout series.
However, it being a top-down game, it does have it's visual misdemeanours, such as the
The game's reward system is quite classic too. The star system is something I've always favoured in the series, with the whizzing or rushing of the flaming stars to come crashing into my self-gratification coz I pressed da buttons and dey do da ting dat it was programmed to do. The actual gameplay itself is quite simple, you're in a runaway car and you're going to crash. It's a lot more interesting to imagine you're a man who recently just went through the worst day in the world and intend to have the most creative day in the world, which includes ending with a multiple car pile-up, however, he keeps having a Groundhog Day-Quantum Leap scenario where he wakes up in a new car and new body everyday and ends it all the same...or I might be insane.
A few minor gripes about the game itself as there were a few framerate issues, even playing on the first level, but nothing to noticable as the game went on. The gameplay element of The Good Cops was a bit weird and has never really come up in previous parts of the Burnout canon...I guess, there really isn't a canon to a series about cars that gone and done smashed demselves up. However, the game does require a bit of strategy and it would have been interesting, if a bit farfetched, if you could place the cops at an entering intersection of yout choice.
See putting in extra obstacles such as The Ambulance, sometimes makes me feel as though they're dragging out the level, but then again hearing the words "Paging Dr. Beat" followed by the song by Miami Sound Machine, just makes me want to throw on some more 80's tracks and start dancing...nobody wants that. But it is a nice touch, if a bit cheap, I say cheap but honestly it resonates with my pop culture brain like a meth addict and I can't wait for that siren blaring bohemoth to come screaming through the streets again.
Having elements such as Tornados and Magnets are incredibly fun and don't outstay their welcome, the actual gameplay does begin to get stale in the other modes, but it's really just a personal preference and I think you should try out the other modes such as Rush Hour and Pile Up, I highly recommend them but they're not particularly my thing.
Rush Hour is a personal pain as I hate almost all timed missions in games and it just frustrates me. It almost seems like it'd be a lot interesting if it was an extra option that you could turn on or off, even have it as a version of the game like a Quick Match section of the game. Meanwhile, Pile Up is just cause as much destruction as possible, it's fun if a bit boring after a while, all the same gameplay elements are there. A co-op implementation would have been freaking amazing with you having to smash into a friend's car on the same interesection and see who could do the most amount of damage on a stretch of road, like a drag-race + Burnout...just an idea, Criterion.
Other than the music, which turns a bit generic but fun after Crash plays, the sound design is phenomanal with firey auto crashes sifting through my ears and the sound of poker machine winnings as points rack higher and higher like the possible animated body count, if the game was any ballsier...coz that's totally a word. The random sound effects add to the crazy style The money has always been an interesting thing to me, not just money in general, God knows how the economy works, but the actual pricing of each car and the potential for costs and multipliers is just something I've wanted to calculate, make a big chart of, actually do math...yep, definitely insane.
In the corner I'm informed I'm a Wannabe, which gives me the assumption that the writers or designers of the game, and a lot of game worlds for that matter, really have this disdain towards players from the get go, but then again I'm a bit of a wuss who can't take any form of criticism whatsoeverpleaseloveme. But the actual gameplay elements are never really against the player, there is a balanced sense of both challenges and even with a plot-less game, there is a drive - whoa, pardon the pun there, been left over for weeks - to actually see the next intersection, the next car and the insanity that will ensue. For example, really how determined are these drivers, logic is best not put in the way of the Burnout series...especially when car magnets are concerned.
Burnout Crash is not a bad game, it's just not a Burnout game. It does take the basic game mechanics of Crash, my honest to God, favourite part of the series, something I always look forward to and just made it a Downloadable Title. I'm looking forward to the good old days of burning through a city doing challenges and having some real fun, but for now, I guess this will tire me over. It's not expensive, it's a lot of fun, it's great to listen to and look at, it's like the
perfect girlfriend...there's your selling caption for Burnout Crash - Burnout Crash: The Perfect Girlfriend.
So Burnout Crash is out, but is it really a Burnout game?
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Although the reception of the gaming public on Call of Duty: Elite may be lukewarm, Wedbush Securities is predicting that the new Activision service will be raking in the big bucks come next year.
According to the analyst firm, "We expect that at least 1 million will sign up for the premium Elite membership by year end. The Call of Duty network effect may be amplified by premium Elite, such that if a gamer's friend purchases premium Elite and gets access to premium maps, the gamer may feel compelled to purchase Elite in order to compete as early and as often as possible."
Their fearless forecast: Call of Duty: Elite will be raking in a whopping US$ 50M by 2012, and luring in as much as three million subscribers by 2013. On top of this, the analysts firm does not think that Activision will be increasing the price for the service, at least not for its first two years, or until it's gained some footing.
Activision confirmed just recently that Facebook will be integrated with the Elite service. The PS3 beta is also set for this summer, although none has been confirmed for the PC.
Via [Gamasutra]
Although the reception of the gaming public on Call of Duty: Elite may be lukewarm, Wedbush Securities is predicting that the new Activision service will be raking in the big bucks come next year.
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Call of Duty: Elite is pulling all stops to lure in fans to their new online service.
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Head's up to all PlayStation fanatics in Europe, here is you weekly dose of PlayStation Store goodness.
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This week's European PlayStation Store update is now live folks, bringing a slew of new contents, special offers and more.
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Here's this week's US PlayStation Store update.
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Microsoft heats up the summer with the fourth annual "Summer of Arcade" promotion, giving all Xbox 360 another reason to stay at home this summer.
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Just in time for the upcoming arrival of the third DLC pack of the game.
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Treyarch has released a new patch for Call of Duty: Black Ops, bringing the game to version 1.10.
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The 3D remake of classic Nintendo 64 title has helped propelled Nintendo's new hardware back on top of the Japanese charts after twelve weeks.
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Crytek has released a new patch for the PC version of Crysis 2, adding a new "Advanced Graphics Options" menu which will allow you to tweak the graphics settings beyond the presets and more. |
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It's been a long time waiting, but finally... the PlayStation Store is now back online. Check out this week's huge PSN update, after the jump! |
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 Nintendo has added five new titles on its downloadable game services, three of which are for the DSiWare while Wii owners will have a pair of WiiWare titles. |
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The latest Ghosbusters title heads to the European PlayStation Store this week, together with some blue swarmites, the Parasite Eve spin-off and the Arrival DLC for Bioware's epic RPG. |
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