Gamer mom won't bake cookies until Cookie-Baking Plasmids are available |
BioShock is popular enough as it is. But how do you know its popularity has reached critical level? It's when mothers are convinced that they can't do household chores without the help of Plasmids from Andrew Ryan.As a humor post to lighten up the mood around here, we're taking something that we stumbled across in a Blogspot entry from one gamer mom named Crystal. You may have heard about her - or not. But the important point here is that you can't deny the impact that BioShock has among its many fans.
We've taken an excerpt from Crystal's blog entry to share it with you guys. This one has Crystal and her 14 year old son Devon, who is trying to convince her to get BioShock - especially right after getting to play the demo:
"So, Mom. BioShock comes out today."
"Mmm. I know. We need groceries. We're out of milk. Don't talk to me about buying anything."
"I've been reading reviews. It's received a perfect in every category. Awesome, huh?"
"Yeah. Milk. Meat. Vegetables. Costly. La la la. I can't hear you."
"You get these things called Plasmids and they control your abilities. And you can upgrade your weapons, even create weapons out of stuff you find laying around."
"Growing children. Need to eat."
"And this one ability? You create bees that pop up right out of your veins and they attack and kill."
"Let's go to Wal-Mart. You guys can live on rice, right? 20 bajillion Chinese people can't be wrong."
Now, here's where he hasn't figured out how to perfect this scam of his. You see, once we get the game home, I'm as good as useless for a few days until I finish it. He mopes and whines because he has to wait.
"When do I get to play? Why can't you be like normal Moms and bake cookies and crap?"
"Does this game have a Plasmid for that? No? Then shaddup and wait your turn."
Hello. My name is Crystal and I'm a gameaholic.
Yeah, we sympathize for poor little Devon. Not only is he deprived of getting to play BioShock (whether on the Xbox 360 or PC), but he won't be able to stuff himself silly with some cookies before bedtime either. And to think he knew quite a lot about the game too, it's sad to note that it's actually rated M. If moms always know best, he'll probably be deprived of BioShock for three more years.
As for Crystal, we do wish there were Cookie-Baking Plasmids available in the market today. You won't believe how much the world would be a better place with more cookie-baking moms to go about (just leave out the Bee Plasmids, thank you very much). And likewise, we could probably use some Common Sense Plasmids as well - because some would say that common sense isn't all too common nowadays.
You might want to click the Read link below to see the full post for some chuckles. Just don't mind that bit referencing John Holmes - the BioShock bit is right after that section.
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Comments [refresh]
Slow news day, then?
Really, who cares.
slow as they come apperently
I don't care about this. You really need a section like "random" or "unrelated." And I swear if I go over to my other blogs and see this story, I'm going to blow a gasket.
If we had Bee Plasmids, we could shoot out billions of bees into millions of boxes and get them to produce honey. Then you have billions of jars of honey, then you sell. Assuming that one jar of honey is one dollar and you have a billion honey jars, then the world has seen their newest billionaire.
I hate everyone who posts on QJ.net, and everyone who writes for QJ.net. I hate QJ.net.
umm. there are bee plasmids already lol go play bioshock
You guys really need to shut the hell up. It's obvious that most of you never take the time to read the entire article. It was a humor post. Gino D. thought it was funny and decided to share it with the readers.
Anyways, that last line me laugh
"Hello. My name is Crystal and I'm a gameaholic."
gd man mr toasty!
what about the fact that she intends to let her 14 yr old son play an 18 game which will warp his tiny little mind, and hopefully he'll go on a some kinda mass killing spree, then we'll have something to talk about eh
Very stupid article. Who the F cares?