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QuickJump QuickList: 20 memorable Jack Thompson quotes

Posted Apr 2, 2008 at 5:52PM EST by QJ Staff

Listed in: Xbox 360, PSP, PS3, Wii, Nintendo DS, PC Gaming Tags: Florida, G4, Jack Thompson, Rampage
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QuickJump QuickList - Image 1


The old adage "one man's hero is another man's terrorist" applies to a lot of situations, and in gaming, it can't be more true. Over the past few years, activist lawyer Jack Thompson has made a name for himself in the gaming media, provoking the ire of consumers, publications, and game makers, all the while winning the support of some concerned parents across America.

We're not here to judge Mr. Thompson. Neither are we inclined to get into a debate with him. Rather, we choose to commemorate some of the most memorable words he has ever written or spoken. Let's face it: There's just so much entertainment value in this regardless what you think about him.

This blogger and QJ.NET's resident game politics buff Tim Y. have combed the web for Thompson quotes and found a treasury of them over at Game Politics and other news sites. Without further ado, here's the twenty best from over 300 remarks::


boxers - Image 120. "My boxers aren't in a knot. Your legal briefs are."

19. "I am a one-man violent video game wrecking crew"

18. "God is very powerful, and He's not real pleased with Rockstar right now, nor with those who defend it. Watch out. Fire and brimstone on the way."

17. "I love the smell of burning gamers in the morning."

16. "Jack Thompson keeps racking up wins and you gamers just can't handle the truth."

15. "At least I'm not a a coward like all of you nerds here, who hide behind anonymous avatars. How sad."

14. "E3 will once again turn down my offer to appear on any stage and debate anyone about the harmfulness of violent games."

13. "Oh? And of what are the games other than self-centered mental masturbation?"

12. " By the way, I was just watching G4 with my son. Who in the world watches this garbage? People with no lives, obviously. Pathetic."

11. "The U.S. military literally uses modified versions of these games, as well as their own video games, to do one thing: to break down the inhibition to kill among new recruits,"

10. "Bully (Wii, Xbox 360)contains homosexual activities between Jimmy Hopkins and other male students. Is this a great country or what?"

Hitler - Image 19. " ...Don't lecture me about how I'm somehow akin to Hitler. Gamers are akin to the Hitler Youth. Pixelantes are vigilantes. You put threats ahead of arguments, extortion ahead of enlightenment."

8. "This is not rocket science. When a kid who has never killed anyone in his life goes on a rampage and looks like the Terminator, he's a video gamer. "

7. "You all need to put down the controllers, get a life, and join the Force, thereby leaving the Dark Side behind. Hooah! Praise be to the Lord, Jesus Christ, the author of all things, even of The Florida Freaking Bar."

6. "PWNED is not a word... as it is in serious need of a vowel movement. Somebody get Vanna White on the phone to buy one. Having said that, this entire site has been "pwned" by Jack Thompson today, and you pixelantes don't even know it."

5. "What the Japanese are doing to our kids is insensitive and racist. The Japanese have for a very long time dumped pornography into this country in a fashion they would not tolerate in their own country. It is another version of Pearl Harbor."

4. "Honestly, are all of you gamers on drugs, I know I am!"

3. "Sims 2, the latest version of the Sims video game franchise...contains, according to video game news sites, full frontal nudity, including nipples, p*n*s, labia, and hair, which I can't wait to "jack" off to with glee!"

lady justice - Image 1 2. "Take-Two has just had sex with the Lady holding the scales of Justice."

1. "I've spent more time riding guys than you've spent playing World of Warcraft."

If those quotes had you craving for more, you can follow this link to find a ton more. The quotes can be traced back to their original sources in the linked page for reference. Enjoy!



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Comments 


 
# lmaoEclipze_ 2008-04-02 09:35
Is Jack Thompson gay or somthing xD.



"E3 will once again turn down my offer to appear on any stage and debate anyone about the harmfulness of violent games."



lol I bet the people organizing E3 saw these quotes too.

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# GTAIVscarface_tha_second 2008-04-02 10:23
will *****ing pwn. 5.8 Million = 1 week. ***** you Thompson, try again.

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# In all honesty thoughscarface_tha_second 2008-04-02 10:25
who the ***** would come up with these quotes?

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# ..xslayer91 2008-04-02 10:46
As much as I hate Jack Thompson I do not think that he said some of these things.

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# Did Jack Thompson just make fun of his son?bloody0986 2008-04-02 11:09
12. " By the way, I was just watching G4 with my son. Who in the world watches this garbage? People with no lives, obviously. Pathetic."



Doesn't it make it sound like he made fun of his son? I mean, he says that when his son watches it.

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# Jack Thompson...NarooN 2008-04-02 11:10
Is a douchebag. Nuff' said. I can;t wait to see next week's quicklist. After reading this, I just want to hunt him down and teach him about "rampages"...

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# Jack is so ignorant here's why.xyal_zx 2008-04-02 11:25
Ok what? Owned is not a word? P is sure close to the O so maybe thats just a funny typo that ppl use. (I agree its freakin annoying but kids come up with dumber ***** that that every 5 minuites) Anyone who knows ANYTHING knows pwned is pronounced OWNED. (its just funnier to say P'owned now, welcome to internet humour all your base now belong to me Jack)



Now as for masturbation wtf are you talkin about jack. Its more like an orgy since online gaming hit the scene.



This is not rocket science. Well no, but I challenge ANY rocket scientist to KOF11 or CvS2. Im going to beat them with my brain.



Well yes jack some of us do like to keep annonymous avatars and such. This sometime pertains to IDENTITY THEFT and other such invasions of privacy. Why would anyone want to introduce themselves to Jack is beyond my imagination.



WTF does racism have anything to do with pornography?

All hentai comes from japan. Stop looking at it if you hate it so much. And how can you compare a victory to Pearl Harbour? Japan didnt see it that way. But to the general American I guess everything is loss or victoriy, good and bad, black and white 2D thinking. Porn is cencored in Japan too so I bet they're more mad at us already for having shaved parts and no cencorship.



Dont get me started on his evangelist comments. I just had to delete all i wrote about those stupid references.

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# what id rather see from gaming tvxyal_zx 2008-04-02 11:31
i have to agree with jack. although i shouldnt cuz i havent watched much. what i did see whas a lot of commercials for new games. (that includes reviews, opinons and all that.) I would like to see some pro gaming like espn. that would be real tv. (like 4 screens of the top players in a fps tournament or some fighting tournaments.)

how about FAQ the show. Today we're going to teach you PSU macros or WOW strategies.

How come nintendo power doesnt have a show?

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# :)Guest 2008-04-02 11:35
You don't know jack, until you know Jack!

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# man...rollypoly 2008-04-02 11:59
the hate i feel for jack, as a stranger, is only surpassed by the sympathy i have for his son.



anonymous comment: i've always felt names and identities are irrelevant, it's the ideas/words/knowledge that matters. i guess knowing who said what really is that important...



i love the one about him riding guys, context is for pussies ;)



i have to agree, some of these seem more like flames from some kid than even the most diluted rantings i've read from this guy before.

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# Older G4 (before TechTV join up)Lazyboy256 2008-04-02 12:42
used to have a couple of gaming sport shows, one I can remember clearly was Arena, where it pit 2 teams of 3 against each other in games like MechWarrior and UT2004, the shows were cool. But yeah, I agree that it should have a show that shows stuff like MLG and things like that.

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# he didGW2 2008-04-02 13:14
they are all one record quotes.

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# thanx QJStingBlah 2008-04-02 13:28
for starting a flame war. You'll get lots of traffic and comments now. Good job.

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# LOLBinary 2008-04-02 13:37
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL OLOL

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# Yup yupEclipze_ 2008-04-02 13:44
Thanks QJ, this article is kool lol.

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# NicoloQuixand 2008-04-02 14:20
i've got a feeling that you've been waiting and waiting for when you'll get to use that..



hahaha

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# Oh Quixand...Guest 2008-04-02 15:43
...you've just begun to scratch the surface of Nico. ^_^

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# :)Guest 2008-04-02 15:45
Keep scratching and you might win the grand prize!

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# lol #1 was funnyMaster Chef 2008-04-02 16:56
Makes you wonder



Though I don't understand what's so great about #11, the military does use "games" (not the games we play, but still) to break the inhibition to kill in new recruits.



And I actually agree with 12, G4 is really, really bad now. I can't stand that trash network anymore, it's almost as bad as MTV

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# Yeah, it used to be greatMaster Chef 2008-04-02 17:00
G4 used to be the best for gaming. Now it's just a bunch of tools for hosts peddling the latest garbage movie (yea movies, not even many games on the network anymore)



Only thing G4 is good for is Ninja Warrior

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# Hmm therefore..Constantinecy 2008-04-03 02:36
we know ***** not knownig Nic? Right?

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# by the wayConstantinecy 2008-04-03 02:49
Nico you better pray for Jack not finding about this or you're in for some pwning sessions with Jacky..

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# ...............The Obsidian 2008-04-03 04:00
is this guy your dad or something Mister sense??i swear he just........well hes almost more of a *****it flamer than you XD hmm.......Iso retard eh? How about........Mister common retard?? yeah thats your knew nick name pal hope your happy

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# ...JaXeRiR 2008-04-03 05:42
The RETARDObsidian.

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# ................The Obsidian 2008-04-03 05:54
what did i do to u? By the way try to be somewhat clever next time you go bashing someone (What the duce does JaxeRiR mean anyways....O_O)

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# jack looses his super law abilitys?bad rider 2008-04-03 08:03
http://gamepolitics.com/category/jack-thompson/bar-trial-series/



just in case anyone didnt notice

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# #7 was the worst onebwilstyle 2008-04-03 09:55
#7 was so dumb. I don't think that guy has ever even seen Star Wars. And on #12, he just admitted he watched it with his son. I feel sorry for his son.

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# JaXeRiRdemondirk 2008-04-03 13:42
are you m sense bum chum too?

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# What the hell...thefinalhero 2008-04-03 14:11
I can't even think of something cruel enough that this egotistical bastard should endure, his wife getting cancer and dying wouldn't be enough pain that this guy deserves. Sorry to anyone who might have been offended by that statement. Seriously, reading that wiki quote entry I can't remember a time where just words have made me so angry.

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# Referencing from Wikiquote?Kagato 2008-04-03 17:11
If you're going to do this, actually follow the citations and verify it's what he said. Wikis are vulnerable to vandalism, and Jack Thompson pages doubly so.



For example, #4 is actually "Honestly, are all of you gamers on drugs, OR WHAT?". #3 has been... extended beyond the original quote.



And that's quotes that are actually cited. If there's no citation, it's probably safe to assume he didn't say it at all.



Sure, the guy's a complete tool; but come on, put a bit of thought into it.

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# @ObsidianBillie 2008-04-04 05:01
Nah its "Mister Common Douche"....

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